When Transformation Becomes the Ordinary Experience For Each Of Us!


07
OCTOBER 2017
I have been granted seeing through a new lens of perception over the past 11 months! It began for me right before the election of Donald J. Trump followed by my watching what seemed to be chaos and turmoil , as many people all over the world put on a cloak of fear and anger.

I watched as thousands of refugees all over the world were ostracized and turned away. I listened in anguish as young Afro-American males faced the highest rate of police killings in 2016. I was shocked to hear that an actor who portrayed a gentle, loving role model on television in the 1980’s was accused by a multitude of women of sexual assault . I observed social media turning into a frenzy of friends spouting hatred and anger toward each other as opposing beliefs and opinions spread like wildfire. I cried in despair to hear of mass killings all over the world as mentally ill and raging murderers obtained arsenals of weapons. In my hometown of Charlottesville, Virginia I was overwhelmed with grief when a group of White Nationalists came into this peaceful town and inflicted violence and extreme racial prejudice. Then came a series of hurricanes and earthquakes affecting not only my country, but other parts of the world.

Other unforeseen incidents occurred that all together seemed like a horror movie unfolding daily. What possible good could be extracted from these scenes? I am here as a witness to the silver lining in spite of the surface insanity! I was given a new pair of glasses to view the world because I believed what I was observing was not what it appeared to be! The silver lining is this in a nutshell….that which was covered underneath decades of denial is now out in the open. Racial prejudice, gender bias, media exaggeration, hatred, and political greed is no longer hidden under a proverbial rock. We can thank the current government administration for being the dark force that has allowed the cracks of light to shine into every living room and into every heart .

In my perception I am grateful…not grateful for the deaths, for the harm, for the abuse of people and the planet …but grateful that the transformation of the majority of us walking around like ostriches with our heads stuck in sand have slowly yet continually awakened ! The transformation is an everyday event….it is becoming a common occurrence of an ordinary experience! We are living in an onslaught of miraculous events that stem from daily activities. The number of us who know without a doubt that no one is going to save us , not our government, not our ancestors, not our religions is increasing weekly. Like hearted people are embracing the fact that we can and are re-creating our world. We are remembering wise sages such as Gandhi telling us “Violence separates people, but the search for truth is a communal enterprise in which we have to work together” and Nelson Mandela who said :”It always seems impossible until it’s done.”

When we each see that each moment, each day, is filled with an opportunity to transmute and transform the usual routines into exciting and explosive magical events in our lives we will choose to rise above the fear, rise above the chaos, and embrace every 24 hours not as terrible situations, but as light filled templates of a new vision for a world we are creating together, and we will soar into peace-harmony- and contentment! Multitudes of visionaries are my friends, my comrades, my allies, and my tribe. We are not alone…we are growing in numbers because we are choosing to be the change we want to see in the world. Do not give up before the miracles you have only dreamed of become the only reality you and I see in our world!

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Embracing The Calm In A World of Chaos


21
SEPTEMBER 2017
I have been watching my world and yours deluged with horrific hurricanes, earthquakes, and politico anger in the past few years. It does seem humanity is sitting on the crux of possible extinction. People are grieving for the world we no longer have. Many people are expressing their thoughts through anger, rage, aggression, and violent actions. Bottom line is many are embracing fear that is fueled with the most progressive technological media we have experienced in our history. Social media posts often instead of providing peace and calm provide information that encourages emotional quicksand sandwiched in a blaming environment of depressive verbal diarrhea.

For the past twelve years I have been re-creating the person I previously was. My personal crisis coincided with the death of my partner and an equal death of a lifetime of codependent behavior. I had made choices and acted upon them freely, yet prior to my decision to live my life differently, I knew no other way to exist. I was an aggressive doormat, filled with anger and fear. Even though I practiced active spirituality, I was a vortex of intense emotions.

In 2013 I relinquished television watching. I cleared and detoxified my body of foods that were creating inflammation within my system. I created a discipline of physical exercise, quiet daily reflection, and stillness. I did not do these things because I am saintly or better than anyone else. I needed to create a new way to live because the old way was literally eating me into a young death. Above all I began practicing being very quiet. Being quiet brought calmness. Once I became quiet, I really noticed how noisy the world had become around me. I noticed people needing to talk without really saying anything other than needing to feed their egos. I noticed loud music, loud machines, louder expressions of anger and fears. Had I not gotten quiet I would have continued to be an equal contributor to the noisy chaos of the world.

I also began attracting a different type of people into my social circle. I was drawn to sensitive, calmer men. I released brash in your face, opinionated women from my life. I also noticed I was becoming kinder and more compassionate. Instead of speaking from my former intellectual , analytical self I was speaking from my heart. This is not to say that at times my old self complete with its shadow personality does not emerge from the depths of my ego because it does. When this happens, it is a giant red flag that I am once again in fear and angry over those things I really have no control over. That is the Cosmic Joke: what most of us have no control over are the very things that trigger our fears and are manifested in the form of anger, depression, frustration, and self righteous thoughts and actions.

Perhaps if we each really looked deeply into ourselves and made a conscious decision to find quiet times many times in each 24 hour period without the cell phone, without the television, without the computer, without social media ,without raising our voices to try to convince each other what great information, brain power we love to call our superior intellect , and I am right vs you are wrong opinions, we might discover we are the ones we have been waiting for…..the ones to save humanity from its self destruction of a downward chaotic spiral.

S-h-h-h-h Did you hear that? Ah that was quiet calmness breathing life back into myself. I welcome you to join the calm.

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Upcoming Usui-Holy Fire 2 Reiki Intro and Reiki 1/Reiki 2 Classes in Charlottesville, VA

Nov. 18, Saturday: FREE!!!!! Intro to Usui/Holy Fire II Reik interactive class: 1:00-3:00PM Love Offering facilitated by Reiki Master, Jennye Zeugner Johnson
In Charlottesville , Virginia
Location will be provided upon receipt of your intention to register:
Limited Space so pre register by sending email to:
info@heartvibrationshealing.com ****Attend this intro and receive a $30 discount for Certification Holy Fire II Reiki 1 &Reiki 2 classes offered weekend of Dec 2 and 3, 2017********

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We Each Just Want To Belong

We Each Just Want To Know We Belong

I live very close to Charlottesville, Virginia, the site of recent violence and confusion. In my personal life in the past six weeks both of my elderly parents have died within 28 days of each other! As a person who feel her feelings deeply, I have had to sort out to which event my feelings and emotions are attached. My intellectual side would like to have no attachments with the emotions to any of these events! My intuitive side , however, tells me I am being given a tremendous opportunity of the highest good!

I have listened and observed people all over the world discussing and dissecting what happened in my town, how it needs to be handled, what went right and what went wrong, and seen millions of fingers pointing the blame at others. I have also listened and observed friends and family who hear of how my parents died 28 days apart, and how hard it must be for my brothers and I to cope.

I attest and witness that all of these events have demanded I grieve. After the shock of all the experiences I have felt, I decided a few things. One, I made a commitment to myself that whenever a feeling…no matter what it was…came up, that I would feel it all the way through, not allowing anything to distract me from that intention. There may be positive distractions such as writing, talking with friends, support groups, exercise, etc. but I know myself pretty well, and know I can let even positive things distract me. Two, I noticed that I need to know where I belong in my little world. Do I belong with those who want to place blame on the reason bad things happen? Do I belong with those who feed on fear and anger? Do I belong with those who believe in an eye for an eye, a punch for a punch? Do I belong with those who live with a compassionate heart? Thirdly, I am very sure I have to get gut level and rigorously honest with myself. I have to see the truth about where I have bias, prejudices, and dark shadowy aspects. We all have prejudices! For change to happen it has first to begin with me. I have to look at my stuff before I can effectively look at yours! You have to look at you first before you look at anyone else. I am sure of this!

People who claim they hate another for the color of their skin, sexual orientation, gender, beliefs, political affiliation, or spiritual/religious ideas can scare me at first. When I slow down, pause, and apply human understanding, I just might see that each and everyone of us only wants to know we belong and have a place in this Universe. We at some point quit listening to each other like we used to. Some of us never listened at all for we just wanted to hear our big, loud ego talk talk talk. Some of us live with the mantra: I am right, you are wrong and I am going to prove it to you! Then some of us take it further and if you do not listen to me while I am trying to prove how right I am, I will become a bully and may even inflict physical-mental-emotional pain on you if I think you do not hear me! Maybe we quit listening because we were too wrapped up in staring at a cell phone, surfing the internet, playing games, or other distractions that came with the age of progressive technology!

My silver lining is I have really began listening …listening to why people in Charlottesville and the rest of the world are angry and scared….listening to how my two brothers and other family feel about the losses of two 94 year old people who were part of our lives for a very long time….listening to how people just want to know they fit into a group, into a social setting, into somewhere where they are heard-accepted-treated with kindness! I am even listening to myself!

I am listening to how kind I am willing to be. I am listening to the words I use with others. I am listening to how often I am willing just to look for opportunities to be of service to my fellow brothers and sisters. I am listening to my pain. I am listening to my joy. I am listening to see if just maybe I can see a young person who feels they are not loved, accepted, or do not fit in anywhere….and reach out to them to show them someone really cares before they go join a group of violent haters who claim to care about them.

We really have an opportunity. We really, if we are willing ,can look at our own defective traits and work diligently on being the best example of US that we can be before jumping on our proverbial bulldozers and harming another. We really can be kind to another who disagrees with us. We really can listen to the thinking and ideas of another who believes the opposite way of us. We really can walk a mile in the moccasins of our fellow brother and sister. Is it too late to create a better world? I believe together we can do what we could never do alone.

Are you listening?

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Changing Relationships

 
“Don’t say the relationship is over. Say it is complete. Some relationships are not meant to last forever.” (The Life Coach School)

      There are multiple reasons relationships change. One person moves…another gets busy with added life responsibilities….someone miscommunicates or misperceives what they thought another said….a boundary is crossed one too many times…one person reacts and cannot get past the hurt…..or it is simply a completion and time to move on!

Change  Is An Opportunity To Grow
Reflecting on friendship relationships, I can think of three people who come and go out of my life. At times we have chosen to talk daily or at least weekly. Then suddenly each of these three  people disappear without explanation. I could analyze why, take their inventory, or simply let it go. I have allowed them to come/go in and out of my life more than a few times.
     I am not sure if it is because I am an aloof Aquarian, or if I had no expectations of any of these people, or if I simply am willing to live in the present with or without them. Each time they seem to drop off the face of my existing life, I notice it but do not really dwell on it. I somehow have learned to let go of any attachment I may have had with them. They appear , when present, to support me and I seem to accept that at the times when they are present they actually do care about me. When they choose to vacate I do not have emotions attached to their decision to do so! It is such a freedom, and I am grateful that these three people offer me the option to enter yet another rung of my ladder of opportunities to grow.
     The most wondrous aspect of these opportunities is that I am afforded the information to see where I have come from. The old me had issues with fear of abandonment, thinking if someone left, it was something I did to cause it. Now I am consciously aware that when a relationship changes, it is for the best, and only a part of the ebb and flow of my life. The gift of being able to let go with grace makes my heart sing!
  Reflecting on how my inner transformations and changes continue, even at those times when the Little Fear Girl that does still live within me questions if I am on the right Path, I know I owe the solutions I have today come from my Spiritual Practices  of nurturing  myself with Reiki,,grounding in Nature,  my personal connection with my Creator, and my openness to welcoming new and old methods of incorporating modalities of mind-body-spirit. I assure you I, as you, am a work in progress……and there is no doubt the best is yet to come!!!!
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Inner Transformation Journey

Inner Transformation Journey

by jaguarwind

You begin to view the world from an inner place when you have walked through a transformation of such a magnitude as if you are viewing life from the perception of the caterpillar as it emerges into a butterfly…you witness those who point fingers in judgment and who may make up accusations that they believe to be true…while you smile inwardly knowing the truth and knowing the other is only speaking out of their confusion and pain, stuck in their self imposed quicksand. The words and actions that at one time would have stung deeply are simply brushed off your skin and shed . Your peaceful spirit keeps walking your walk as you welcome new experiences and new faces. There is not even a need to surrender.Such is the gift of transformation.

In my journey of traveling my feet have touched cobblestone streets, ancient pathways, and fairy enchanted meadows. Journeying alone often fosters intimate conversations with seemingly strangers whose heart rendering stories create memories that all parties will hold dearly for passing times between the speaker and the listener. Sharing what was the turning point in our respective lives, we feel a gentle tear roll down the cheek of each of us. Smiling with each other, we go our separate ways, grateful for the communing of a brief, but sacred relationship.

Transformations cannot be planned or even expected. As I entered an English Cathedral I was overtaken by the silence of the multitudes of those already present. Without speaking we share the sanctity of stained glass windows, wooden pews, and unlit candles awaiting unspoken and unthought prayers. Reverence fills my changing heart as I am transported back to my future of Divine Grace filling wants and needs I was not even aware of asking. Gentle inner tears saturate my soul as I am moved to offer eye contact with the others gathered in this place.

As I open the heavy wooden door rays of sunlight pierce my vision and I know I have been lifted to another realm of peaceful existence. I notice nothing I thought before leaving my home to undertake this journey really matters now. No need to figure out a plan or to set goals to achieve success . Hurtful words spoken to me by a friend the day before my departure for this journey are irrelevant and meaningless to me now. I embrace my transformation and wear it like a loose garment around my shoulders. I have arrived to wherever this here is,  and will forever be part of the metamorphosis of the creature I have now become.

Transformations of my life…there have been many. This one, however, is gentle and soft . I walk towards a bakery lured by the seductive smell of freshly made pastries and fall into a sweet slow pace as my feet seem to float forward. I smile knowing I will never return to the who that I was, unsure of the who I have become. Really it does not matter for all I need is the unraveling of the melody of my Heart-Strings being played out as I enter the bakery. What would I like asks the clerk as I point to a cheese filled strudel. My inner child giggles at me as I welcome the warm taste on my palate. Transformations come in many forms. I will relish this one for a long while.

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Kindness Matters

Traveling is indeed an opportunity for adventure! It is  my personal vision to spread a positive attitude peppered with kindness everywhere I go! I hear many people speak of the terrible world our planet has become…of the prejudices, biases, acts of terror and  assault. I know today’s world does contain this side to it. I also know there is another aspect of the world I know, and when I am traveling I get to not only experience the other side but I also have a choice of what I want to contribute!

When I am in my familiar setting of the place I call “home” I observe how people treat me and how I, in turn, treat others; however, when off on a traveling adventure I notice even more the behaviors of others and myself. It has become crystal clear to me that I teach people how to treat me, and it is my perceptions that create what I “SEE” in the world. 

On a daily basis I have a choice to focus on the positive…or to focus on the negative. When traveling I see fellow travelers as the composite of the creation of the story I want to experience. I can open my heart in a compassionate way to fellow drivers, people at the gas stations and stores, fellow foodies in restaurants, as well as all the workers who make up places I go in my travels. The other choice I have is to go through the world as an egotistical, controlling, rude traveler..believing all is about me and my current agenda. I have also in my life been this person. However, over the years awakenings have gently and not so gently rocked me into the belief that what I give out I receive back. Some call this karma. Some call it what goes around, comes around. Even some call it fate. There are people who believe that opening mouth and inserting foot, not pausing before pushing the send button on an email or a post on social media…is their right. And…of course it probably is! However, what we give out will return to us …maybe not in the same time frame…but eventually we will receive the kindness or the  rudeness that we have given out. 

I practice intentional living. Each day before I enter the world, before I pick up the phone, before I send an email or post a comment, before I leave my current lodging, I set the intention I wish to send out. This day I am making the intention to give kindness wherever I go…NO MATTER WHAT. I am hoping it will catch on. What a concept! Part of this idea is to check in with myself before inflicting any of my stuff on anyone else! If I make this choice daily during the times I may feel fearful, angry, frustrated, confused, etc. I can reach into my cosmic bag of tools and do something to either eliminate or decrease the feeling . Why would I do that?????? Only I would do that because my intention is to send out kindness. It is easier to be kind when I am not a bundle of some negative emotion. I am not perfect at this plan. I sometimes forget but know I get to start my day over once I remember I am not practicing my intentions! 

A few days ago I met a friend for a couple of days in Northern Florida. While we were together in different places  the opportunity arose to give kindness to several people….waiters, hostesses, clerks in stores. This friend and I both set intentions. We did not discuss what we were doing. We simply both freely gave the gift of kindness to others who crossed our paths. It takes practice to do this. It takes making a choice. I have noticed the more I practice setting positive intentions, the more prosperity…the more loving smiles and actions…the more at peace I have become. Does this mean everyone will exude kindness to me? No it does not. It does mean that if one of those fearful, angry people exudes meanness and disrespect, I still have a choice to respond with kindness and tolerance . 

On this day as I prepare to walk on the beach I am going to intentionally pay attention for opportunities to be just a little kinder, just a little more loving, and to practice walking a mile in someone else’s moccasins because it is not all about me and whatever plan or agenda I have for this day. We are in this world together, and I know I cannot change the world, but I can do my part as a traveler and fellow human being to be kinder. I love the vision of peaceful traveling!

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The Legacy I Want To Leave Behind

“We all die. The goal is not to live forever. The goal is to leave something that will.” (Chuck Palahniuk, Journalist)
I have been reflecting lately on my attitudes and actions I show those whose pathways cross mine, and asking myself what is it that is important to me to leave behind and what I would like to be remembered for.

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I invite you to join me as we continue on our respective journeys toward authenticity this week as we each reflect upon who we really are, what we are showing the world , and how do we want to be remembered. Because I believe actions speak louder than words, I am choosing to look upon my life, and the effect I have and want to have upon others in my little world. If you were to leave this world tonight, what is the legacy you would leave behind based upon your life thus far; and, is this the legacy you are proud of?

How I will be remembered will be determined by how I co-exist in the world, and by how I treat others. To determine how I am doing in this endeavor, I came up with 5 questions I am asking myself.
1. Do I practice love and compassion with friends, family, as well as strangers?
2. Do I allow myself to be vulnerable, allowing the real me to be seen in those relationships I tell myself are meaningful to me?
3. Do I put service to humankind first and before a need to brag about my accomplishments and wisdom, to be a name or place dropper or to glorify my “great deeds” ? For me I voice that service first is a priority, so it is crucial I assess if that is what I am actually attempting to do!
4. Do I give time and energy to familiar people as well as unfamiliar ones by reaching out to help another with no desire or egoic need to be recognized for my giving ? In other words, if someone needs 5-20 minutes of my time, am I willing to give up a priority I have in my busy day to reach out to another without needing a pat on my proverbial back for doing so?
5. Do I really listen to what others are saying and not interrupt to offer advice or suggestions that is not asked for? Do I stop my brain from judging what the person is saying, and only listen to their feelings and opinions?
By getting gut level honest in looking at what I want to be remembered for, and checking in with myself to see if I am acting out of my truth and authenticity, I can choose to continue life as I have been living it …or I can choose to alter my day to day actions, and try to improve on a daily basis just a wee bit.

Does your current life measure up to the legacy you wish to leave behind or does it, as I have discovered in myself….need tweaking and some setting of new daily intentions to be more of the best “ME” I can be?

Walking Beside You On The Journey,
Jennye

Written by Heart Vibrations Healing/Jennye Johnson 10-7-2016

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Self Love

 

 

 

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Self Love
It Affects All Areas of Our Lives!

April 8, 2016

Greetings!

“Self-love for ever creeps out, like a snake, to sting anything which happens to stumble upon it.” (Lord Byron , poet)

I really believe no one loves oneself 100 % of the time. I also believe almost all emotional despair and issues stem from a lack of self love. I invite you to join me on our respective pathways in living the Authentic Life as we reflect on evidence self love is present or absent, and how being aware of the ebb and flow of self love can trigger us , inspire us, block us, and transform us!

What Is Self Love?
Why Do I Need To Love Myself?

When I was young I received the indirect messages from a variety of sources that if I did things for others , I would be loved. I had no clue that I needed to love myself first. My reptilian brain was filled with gremlins….gremlins that fed feelings of unworthiness and not feeling I was good enough. Self Love is coupled with Self Esteem. When we have poor, low, or no self esteem we most likely have deprived ourselves of self love. We search outside of ourselves looking for the love that will make us feel worthy and whole. We try to feel good about ourselves with material possessions, relationships, food, alcohol/drugs, money, sex…anything to fill that inner black hole void within us. When these outside things work temporarily through instant gratification and then stop working, we then bring out the proverbial two by four and start battering ourselves with self criticism, self doubt, and self sabotage! SELF LOVE is a conscious choice, decision , and intention to live a life of confidence, contentment, and inner peace which will result in experiencing happiness.

Evidence Of Practicing Self Love
Self Lovers Have Learned How To Live Life Differently

Self Loving Has These Practices Present: Self Lovers Devote Energy to Their Passions and Inner Longings instead of putting them on hold Self Lovers Have Self-Dates and relish alone time instead of having to spend all their time with partners, friends, or others. When they deprive themselves of their alone time, they miss it and will create the space and time for Self. They do not feel this time is selfish or need to use one of the “going outside of themselves false solutions ” to feel better because they know spending time alone is the solution for feeling wonderful! -Self Lovers have mastered teaching people how to treat them and freely walk away from any relationships that do not respect, honor, or value them….all without guilt! When we do not love and respect ourselves we attract others who do not also! -Self Lovers take responsibility by accepting and acknowledging mistakes and not blaming another for issues or problems that arise in life! They will look for a positive way to focus when a challenge shows up in front of them. -Self Lovers take a breath, pause, and reflect rather than allowing negative feelings and emotions to trigger them into using prior toxic reactions and methods (that do not really work) of seeking inner peace outside of themselves.

How To Be Aware Of Emotional Triggers
Knowing Our Own Red Flags

Because we each are Spiritual Beings having a Human Experience, we will never be perfect. We are going to, at times, get triggered. Our Reptilian Egoic mind is going to try to convince us at these times to practice non self loving activities. What can we do instead? We can listen to our bodies which will tell us when we are triggered IF we are paying attention. When we feel those feelings arising within, we can stop and check in with our Inner Truth and have this inner dialogue: What just happened? What is the underlying cause of the current feeling? Does the situation remind us of a past partner, parent, or situation that was unpleasant? At the moment of awareness, we can make a choice to pause and get into a solution we know from our personal experience that works rather than become numb or reacting with anger! If we even suspect we have been triggered, but cannot identify it totally, we can still stop and write or breathe and reflect instead of being an Explosive Reactor or a Depressed Numb Zombie! ***If it is difficult to listen to our bodies for messages, we may start by setting an alarm on our cell phone or clock every 2 hours to check in and ask: How am I really feeling? What is going on that is making me feel wonderful or triggering me to feel something else???****

Getting Started in Your Own Self Loving Practice
Some Suggestions

Start a Loving Myself Journal 1. An attitude of gratitude is necessary! Get out pencil and paper. It really increases our inner transformation to write this instead of typing it! Write daily for 28 days 5 or more things you are grateful for in your life that you have right now: I am grateful for and blessed to have in my life____________ because___________ (the reason). 2. Stand in front of a mirror and look into your eyes and say aloud: (Your Name), I love you completely. I love ___________(list specific characteristics about yourself including the shadowy parts such as being a loud mouth, arrogant, a show off, etc. as well as the other aspects as helping others, laughing, being compassionate and caring, moving your body via walking or other exercise, etc. Do this even if you do not fully embrace all of you. Remember practice makes progress!!!! 3. Make a weekly date with yourself! Take yourself out and treat your Divine Wonderful Self to an activity you love! Go only with YOU and embrace YOU! Do this once a week no matter what comes up! Put it on your calendar and follow through! 4. Reflect on any people in your world, including friends and relatives, that you can start weeding out. If you have friends or others that have a need to judge, disrespect, or treat you unkindly…reflect on if they are trying to help or are do they have another motive? Consider anyone or anything that needs to be removed from your immediate world in order for you to love yourself more. 5. Write 3 Specific Things you can do each day that would be considered Loving Acts, and Do them all!

Practicing Self Love may be challenging initially because so many of us have experiences that do not reflect that we are worthy and deserve to be loved! Many of us put a greater focus on those negative memories of our lives rather than the positive ones. Perhaps we do not trust ourselves! By beginning and committing a Self Loving Practice, we may just find that loving our selves and giving permission to create a life of being a Self Lover, that we are more available to being of Real Service to Others, to being of Real Service to Ourselves, and to living a happy life filled with Joy! I am very excited that you are making the conscious decision as I, too, am…to develop and create daily evidence of Being Self Lovers, not Selfish Lovers in the world! (If at anytime the suggestions in our newsletters bring up unresolved and painful issues, please consult your medical professionals for assistance in dealing with your feelings and experiences!)

Walking Beside You On the Journey, Jennye


Jennye

Heart Vibrations Healing
phone: To Be Given Upon Request

 

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Self-Forgiveness

We all make mistakes from me to you to Spiritual Leaders. The power of forgiveness, particularly, Self Forgiveness ,is a monumental stepping stone to individual healing. Perhaps you are aware that when we are able to admit harm done to others and ourselves in the past, feel remorse, learn from our mistakes, and move forward that a transformation within us can occur. How wonderful if each person in the world would do that! However, most people choose to pull out their proverbial 2 by 4 and beat themselves into misery and self criticism far beyond any point of effectiveness! I invite you to walk the journey of Authenticity once again as we reflect on the need and the solution of self forgiveness within each of our lives.

It Is All In The Past

Acceptance word on a 3d blue puzzle piece and a hole with the word PeaceWe only regurgitate actions causing harm in the past, never in the present moment. It may surprise you to know there are basic similar acts that people choose to dredge up in their minds that , if self forgiveness, was practiced , there would be no reason to put ourselves through internal suffering! Some of these are: 1. Failure and deterioration of a life event such as a relationship or a career. 2. Promising to follow through on something that you let slip away such as saving enough money for your child’s education, financial stability in retirement years, or not being present for a sick parent/friend/lover in their time of need. 3. Engaging in addictive behaviors that have harmed others and yourself such as abusing alcohol, drugs, food, sex, gambling, co-dependency, or manipulative acts of controlling others. 4. Selfish acts taken to get what you wanted , and in the process harmed others as you walked right over them with your eyes only on the prize of that thing you had to have and own.

Consequences of Lack of Self Forgiveness
It Is Always Either Love or Fear

When we refuse to forgive ourselves or do not know how to even start, we carry into aspects of our lives and into our relationships (partners, friends, relatives, co-workers, neighbors, anyone we come into contact with) the shame, guilt, and suffering that lives within us. When we carry this internal shame and suffering, the people we care about suffer also . This is due to the fact we are wearing a hooded cloak of guilt that encompasses the behaviors of being more critical, more judgmental, and being emotionally unavailable. It does not stop with affecting others for our thoughts about our suffering create chemicals within our bodies that disrupt our digestion, increase heart rates and blood pressure levels, tighten muscles, and affect our memory-cognition! Additionally, each time we re-visit our story of shame, guilt, and remorseful acts of unresolved self love and forgiveness we flood our body with new destructive chemicals!

A Few More Thoughts ….
 READ ON………

Sometimes we humans will use the rationalization monkey and only think we have forgiven ourselves but have not owned our part taking responsibility for our actions. If this is the case, we may feel relieved of the feelings we have been carrying around in our energetic sack of unhappiness but we have managed to decrease compassion and empathy for others and have blocked our own motivation to make amends . In other words, we are in denial of our own healing! Remorse and fear can be our friend…..by encouraging the need and actions for positive change. When we make the decision to embrace our fear instead of running from it or trying to deny it, we have solved more than half of our problem!

A Plan For Right Actions
Some Suggestions

Here are some tips that may help you practice self forgiveness: 1. Name your devil in writing! Write exactly what you did or what you did not follow through on. Write next who was harmed and how. Include YOU! 2. Write a story about how you felt prior to the decision of the act,during the act, and after the act. How did you feel about the people involved? 3. Assess what your motives at the time were. Be honest if you want an outcome of self forgiveness! 4. Write about the triggers of your behavior. Many times our actions are triggered from unresolved, old events in our lives. Did the triggers remind you of another event, another time , such as something in your childhood or in a challenging relationship? 5. Were your beliefs at the time of the acts you are now dredging up that happened in the past the same as beliefs you hold in the present time? Were the beliefs you held back then yours or did they belong to a church, a parent, a teacher, a friend, someone else??? 6. Reflect back to the time of the event that you now feel guilt or shame over. Was the action aligned with your core belief at the time or did you make the decision to discard your value and belief? If this is true for you, then you did more harm to yourself than to anyone else! You let yourself down, and are still punishing yourself. ********At this point take a BIG Breath!!******** 7. Create ways to make amends to yourself! Here is one way: Write a letter from your Future Self, and YES you have one! Write to your prior self , the one in the past who committed the harm . Tell him/her how proud you are of the lessons learned. List the solutions you now have and are using. Throw some confetti to celebrate !!!!!! 8. Claim the fact that you are not who you were. You are a Spiritual Being Having a Human Experience who may make more mistakes because you are human and will not be perfect in the body you currently live within, but you can choose to learn from your experiences and amend or change your ways of living life.

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